Lost Without You
by umaficwriter
Summary: 7th on Crowen Playlist Challenge! Their final chapter, sadly inspired by Freya Ridings' song!


Lost Without You

**Summary**: 7th on Crowen Playlist Challenge! Their final chapter, sadly inspired by Freya Ridings' song!

**Disclaimer**: Grey's Anatomy belongs to Shonda Rhimes and ABC!

**Author's** **Notes**: as always with this challenge, you can find the soundtrack in my 'Crowen – Cristina Yang and Owen Hunt' playlist on Spotify! ALSO, I want to dedicate this work to Patsy! She/he is a very nice guest reader that always makes some time to leave a comment! Thanks, dear! Enjoy!

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

It all started on that spring day. She had said goodbye from the OR gallery and he just couldn't bear the thought of never seeing her again. So as soon as his surgery was done, he let Kepner close it and ran out of the Hospital to the airport.

_Standing on the platform__  
__Watching you go_

The airport was crowded, it was expected due to the shopping mall incident, people were coming to Seattle to get information on loved ones.

Owen passed by so many people, he was already losing his hope in seeing her before her departure, when out of the sudden, he saw the mass of black curls and slim figure.

Probably, she was headed to her gate already, he had taken long enough operating, after all.

In one blink, he had lost her again, and since she wasn't waiting for him to come, there was no way of her knowing he was there.

Hunt tried her cell but, of course, it went straight to voicemail.

He caught her head again, this time, going in the catwalk to the plane. How come, he had lost her _again_?

_It's like no other pain__  
__I've ever known__  
__To love someone so much__  
__To have no control_

If he didn't know better, Owen would say his heart was breaking inside his chest. The pain of losing all his people at the desert was excruciating, yes, but watching she _literally_, walk away and being able to do nothing about it… was just too much.

He had no control of his tears, and when he came to his senses again, after watching her plane take off, he was already crying with utterly force. Teardrops wetting his shirt and shoes.

It was like no other pain he ever known of.

_You said, "I wanna see the world"__  
__And I said, "Go"_

At the same time, he felt his heart squirming inside him, he could never ask her to stay. Not for him, at least.

He _loved_ her, for sure. He loved her more than _anything_ in the whole world and he'd do anything for her, _including_ letting her go.

She deserved the world and he couldn't give it to her.

He loved her enough to let her go, yes, but that didn't make it hurt any less.

Maybe Owen did not know that, but Cristina was grateful he hasn't asked for her to give up Zurich, because she knew, if he did, she would. And it would also break her.

She was grateful he loved her that much. If only he knew she loved him so much to the point of leaving him behind…

She would never give him what he dreamed of for his life, and Cristina sadly decided that it was for the best that she moved overseas. The opportunity had appeared just at the right time.

_I think I'm lost without you__  
__I just feel crushed without you__  
__I've been strong for so long__  
__That I never thought how much I needed you_

It didn't make it hurt any less, though.

What was she _thinking_?

That she would get over him as soon as she arrived in Switzerland?

Against her better judgment, she had, indeed, thought that way.

How _foolish_ of her.

She hasn't realized how much she missed and needed him 'till she got inside her hotel room, allowing herself to break down for the first time since she left Seattle. It hurt like hell.

Owen felt _crushed_.

As if all the light from the world was taken and he had been left in the dark. _Alone_.

_Strangers rushing past__  
__Just trying to get home__  
__But you were the only__  
__Safehaven that I've known__  
__Hits me at full speed__  
__Feel like I can't breathe_

He was aware of how much he loved her, and that it would hurt, but this feeling? It was cruel and heavy. It was like his chest was being pressed and he couldn't breath with ease anymore.

Hours passed after her flight took off, and still he was there. Staring at where the plane once was.

It was like he had lost something he held very dear to his heart.

It was like the feeling you have when you go to work and just know you forgot _something_ behind.

It was like losing something very precious and important, that you couldn't just replace, because the thing before was just so unique, you could never think of anything to be in its place.

_Her_ _place_.

_And nobody knows__  
__This pain inside me__  
__My world is crumbling__  
__I should never have__  
__Let you go_

He entered the trailer after sometime, and went to the couch.

He looked around him.

They had sold the firehouse because it meant a lot and they couldn't get over the memories. It was too much.

And now, drinking in the trailer, Hunt concluded that it was also, too much being here. Without her.

They've been 'saying goodbye' for two weeks before today, and every time she postponed Zurich, he felt guiltily a little better, even though he knew better than to get his hopes up. She _wasn't_ staying.

Now it was here, Owen just could not comprehend.

He would never work with her again, would never kiss her good morning at GSMH.

It was just out of his understanding abilities.

He felt like a fool facing things this way, but he couldn't help it.

He _missed_ her already.

The time would pass. The years would come and go. Maybe someday, he'd move on and have a family, but the cruelty of it all was: he would never get over her, would never forget what they had. He would always compare everybody to her.

His brain was reprehending him on _how could he let her go without a fight? _

His heart was assuring him it was for the best.

Didn't make it hurt any less.

_Standing on the platform__  
__Watching you go__  
__You said, "I wanna see the world"__  
__And I said, "Go"_

**Author's** **Notes**: Hey guys! That was short, I know, but I just wanted write some Crowen feels using this song for so long, and I could not et it pass anylonger, so I'm sorry if you were expecting some other outcome.

This song give me the chills, because it just describes their final chapter together, I wanted to just post the song and let you imagine it all haha, besides Freya's voice is BLISS!

Hope you liked it anyway tho, I'll see you guys again very soon! Xx


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